Problems for working women don’t seem to end after child birth. This is the time when post pregnancy anxiety regarding work impacts their mind, disrupting their work-life balance. Companies today offer maternity leaves upto six months which might be adequate for physical recovery but is still not enough for a new mom to have her peace of mind.
Maintaining proper mental health is as important as maintaining physical health during and post pregnancy. At least one out of every six women in developing countries experience mental health issues during pregnancy, and at least one in five women suffer from depression and other illnesses after childbirth, according to a WHO study. Here are some issues working women face once they resume work post their maternity leave and tips on how to deal with them.
Workplace behaviour and stress
It is emotionally, mentally and physically difficult for the mother to attune herself to the work atmosphere after a break. Instead of lending a helping hand, co-workers end up judging the mother for her decisions. Another problem is that unless pre-negotiated, many women have to accept a lower job role and pay with no guarantee of when they would be back on the track, just because of the maternity gap.
This is how mothers can deal with workplace stress:
Mothers can reach out to sympathetic people who they can be honest with and take help in managing work related stress.
Before going on a break, mothers can negotiate a contract for job role, designation and pay with the firm. They can make sure to quantify these on paper or email and have a clear understanding of company’s expectations once they resume.
Moms can expect some boredom, meaninglessness, and some days of worry once they join back work. They should give themselves the required time to adjust to new structures. They should be mentally prepared for insensitive behaviour from some people at office.
Mixed messages
Varied and confused messages by family members are quite common. Be it the husband, one's own parents or in-laws, they all give out mixed reactions about resuming work post pregnancy to the new mother.
Instead of trying to change family members’ attitude which might take time, some things that new moms could do are:
Taunts and fights may get common when moms are in the transition mode of going back to work after pregnancy. Mothers can acknowledge others care for them and their child, understand the concerns and views, and at the same time, highlight how they have arranged for the child's needs.
There might be at least one person who is okay with mothers working or gets their point of view. Mothers could reach out to these supportive people, explain the situation and what they feel, and list out what they need in terms of support.
Separation and replacement anxiety
Young kids face separation anxiety when moms return to work. Mothers undergo trepidation about their child and this can make working tough. When going back to work, mothers arrange for caregivers, nannies or some other option for the child. Many mothers also fear that they will get replaced by the caregiver and the child will not love them as much.
This separation and replacement anxiety can be reassured by understanding the scenario. The child will be good as long as there is someone to love and care for him while the mother is at work. Mothers can set up a timetable to call the caregiver and find out if everything is okay. This will help to keep the anxiety under control. Once they’re home, they can spend some quality time with the child. As long as they spend time with the child daily, no one can replace mothers.
Guilt
The work-life balance goes for a toss with women entering the “mommy track.” Once women return to work, they are confronted with the responsibility of childcare as well as pressure to get back to the performance level they were at before the maternity leave. When it is time to go back to work, mothers may feel immense levels of guilt as the child is still young and they feel that leaving the child for work commitments is wrong.
The guilt is only because of some preconceived notions fed to mothers. As long as the child is cared for and mom is content going to work, it's all worth it.
(Written by Dr. Ajay Phadke, CEO, founder of Type a Thought)
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