How to Avoid High School Stress

Grades

Stop procrastinating. Procrastination is a common habit people tend to develop in the middle school and high school years as their workload increases. Students procrastinate since they don't want to take on such a huge task at once. Or, they have more interesting things to concentrate on, which aren't related to schoolwork (e.g. YouTube, video games, a good book). Procrastination is a bad habit because it makes you wait to start important things until the last minute. This reduces the quality of your work and leaves you with chronic stress. Develop self-control, and remove distractions out of your sight. Lock them up if you need to, or block the distracting websites for a certain amount of time until after your homework time. Break a large task into small steps that seem more achievable. For example, break a 5-paragraph essay into 3-5 parts, depending on how much you can manage. Give yourself some breaks. Every 30-50 minutes, take a break and stretch to refresh your brain. This can make you think more clearly. Don't think about a math problem for 20 long minutes; take a 10-minute break and think about it afterward. If you still can't solve the problem, skip it and ask the teacher for help next class.

Study smart. Everyone studies differently, and everyone needs to study. Don't be overconfident that you can ace a test in high school without studying even a day like you did in elementary or middle school. The curriculum load has increased from middle school, and lessons will be longer with more detail. You can't memorize an hour of lecturing in your mind, so you will have to study. Find out what method of studying is best for you. Remove all distractions, so that your results are accurate. Next, study with one method (e.g. using flashcards, reading your notes, playing a review game, watching videos, or someone quizzing your questions). Take your test and see which method works better for you when you test yourself multiple times with different study methods. Remember, studying for longer doesn't necessarily mean that you're studying efficiently. Cramming in a lot of info at once is not effective. Take brain breaks by getting up and stretching.

Use the internet to your advantage. No, don't use the internet to go onto social media, play online games, or watch videos. You can do this during your free time, but when you are studying on the weekdays, close these tabs. Avoid the temptation to open these tabs by installing a web browser extension that blocks these websites. You can also install an extension that monitors the sites you are on and reminds you that you should close these websites. To study, you can use online flashcard websites such as Quizlet. There are also online game sets like Kahoot, Quizizz, and Blooket for you to play for a review session. Online videos on the subject can be great summaries of the content you have learned.

Go to a teacher's help session for help. Whether you missed a few days of class due to a sickness, or if you weren't paying attention, you should go to a teacher's help session if you need help on something. You can ask your parents for help, but keep in mind that as the curriculum gets more challenging, they may not know how to teach you. In high school, practice asking the teacher for help more often. Attend their office hours, which is usually a time after class (e.g. during breaks, lunch, school dismissal) in which they help students who are struggling. If you are only struggling with a small concept, you don't need to go to their sessions frequently. For example, if you are only confused about one math problem, you may only need to go there for a few minutes. If you need help on a larger topic, you may need to go there more frequently. Think about the main question to ask the teacher beforehand. Rather than just saying, "I don't get it", pinpoint the areas you need help with. "I need help on multiplying polynomials" is a more specific task that your teacher can help you with than "I don't get algebra".

Be wise when choosing your courses for next year. When the time comes, you will need to choose your courses for next year, whether that's 9th grade or 11th grade. You'll need to think about your skill level, as well as your extracurriculars to determine how many courses you can take. Starting from 10th grade, you can choose AP courses, which are college-level courses you can take in high school to receive credit. However, some competitive schools may offer AP courses during freshman year. These are more challenging than honors or regular courses, so you shouldn't take too many of them. You should also take courses according to your interests. Just because your friends or your parents want you to take a course doesn't mean that it is best for you. Some people in competitive or private high schools take as many as 4 or 5 AP courses a year, but that usually just stresses them out. As a result, they get lower scores. In total, you should take 8-12 for 4 years, which means 2-3 AP courses a year should be plenty. Besides, taking a ton of AP courses doesn't guarantee that you'll be accepted to an Ivy League university. Don't take as many advanced courses if you have numerous extracurriculars. Is it easy for you to juggle your usual classes along with piano, soccer practice, and chess? If you are fine with your current schedule, you may choose a similar schedule for next year. If you felt under a lot of stress this year, you shouldn't take many AP courses for next year.

Relationships

Find a few good pals. If you can, find at least one good friend in high school. You don't need too many friends; just one or two is fine. Having a lot of friends can be stressful if none of them are close to you. Having a few close friends is beneficial. They can help support you during your lowest points during your teenage years, and they can be a source of entertainment. Friends can improve your mental health. You can be a loner, but keep in mind that it may be more difficult to get help or support without any close friends. If you're new to the school, try talking to people in your classes during class discussions to get to know everyone better. If you're a freshman, try talking to other freshmen during breaks, lunchtimes, and class discussions.

Learn how to socialize. High schools are often larger than middle school and elementary schools, which means there will be more people in them. You will meet all kinds of people in high school, so be prepared. Understand social cues, such as friendly waving or being closed off, to determine whether or not people want to talk to you. Think of interesting topics to talk about, as well as conversation starters. Small talk is dreaded by many, but you'll have to think of small talk to start a conversation smoothly. If you want to be friends with the person, spend time with them. Share contact information, and invite them to events outside of school. If you don't want to be friends with the person, politely decline their request.

Don't rush into a romantic relationship if you don't want one. You may see many couples around you in high school, kissing and holding hands. You may romanticize dating and get desperate to find a partner even if you don't want one right now. It's best not to get influenced by peer pressure like this. You don't need a partner right now, especially since you are still very young. You may decide to find one in college, at your job, or stay single. Besides, think of all the good things you can do when you're single and young. You're independent, and you don't have to think about intimacy or how to get along. Some people get too into their relationships and start failing their classes. Staying single prevents you from getting too obsessed with something else.

Think realistically when getting into a relationship. Whether it's platonic or romantic, you should think of realistic standards to set your friendships and relationships too. You're unlikely to stay very close with your high school friends for long, as graduating and moving to different colleges will separate you physically, making it difficult for the bond to stay as strong. In movies, you may see people dating good-looking, smart, and talented significant others, but understand that this is difficult to achieve. No one is perfect, and your partner is likely to have some bad habits or bad parts of their personality that you learn to compromise with. So no, don't try finding the most popular person in your school to date, or date someone because of solely their looks. Find someone with a good personality; someone who treats everyone fairly, respects others' decisions, and has a good moral compass.

Stand up for yourself. Don't stay passive-aggressive, since this will prevent the two of you from communicating openly. Over time, this will lead to mistrust and lies. It's always okay to advocate for yourself. Don't be scared that you'll offend the person; true friends or significant others will respect your choice, or at least try to compromise with you if they don't agree. Use "I" language when talking about your feelings so it doesn't seem like you're blaming the other party. In a romantic relationship, don't be forced to have sex if you're not ready. You can stay abstinent for as long as you want. You should discuss birth control methods and boundaries with your partner first before you have any sex.

Stay away from certain types of people. In your social life, you will meet many people. You may stay friends with some successfully and break up with others. Stay away from people you know are toxic. These people will make your life miserable, or as if you're walking on eggshells. It is very difficult to be yourself when you're around them, and they may share harmful rumors about you behind your back. If you are in a relationship, break up (platonically or romantically) if you see some warning signs of them being toxic. The person regularly spreads harmful gossip behind people's backs. They act completely nice to someone in person but act cold-hearted and mean behind their back. The person doesn't respect your boundaries. They always step over your boundaries. For example, they may visit you very late in the night or gossip constantly. They may force you to do things you don't want to do. They encourage you to do risky things, such as drink underage, smoke, have unprotected sex, be truant, etc. They have an unpredictable mood. They may be happy one minute and throwing a tantrum the next. These people can be scary to be with, so it's best to leave this type of relationship. They show any signs of violence, such as slapping, hitting, pushing, or shoving. The person regularly lies and manipulates people to get what they want. They may say far-fetched lies or mask their true intentions behind a smile.

Tell someone close to you if you are struggling. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It's okay to not understand something or to be stressed out. As well as the support of a teacher if you are going through academic stress, someone close to you can provide emotional support. If you are going through a tough time (e.g. a breakup, self-esteem issues, family problems), lean on your friends or a partner for support. If they are willing to support you even through your toughest moments, they are truly a well-rounded person. You don't need to act tough; this may stress you out more and lead to more pressure along the way. They may not have the solutions to your issues, but they will find ways to comfort you when you are struggling.

Working on Yourself

Volunteer and get involved. High school is usually the time when teens find suitable job opportunities after high school or college. Schools in different states require students to do hours of community service to graduate. Additionally, private high schools or religious ones may require their students to volunteer too. It may seem like a daunting task, but you can find places to volunteer with the help of the internet. Search around your neighborhood to find places that need help. You can help pick up trash around the neighborhood. You may also tutor children or help out at your local library. You can help out at elementary or middle schools, as well as volunteer at animal shelters. There are plenty of ways on how to volunteer. You can just search "teen volunteering opportunities" along with your location.

Attend clubs. Clubs are fun places where you get to meet other people who like the same things as you. You meet more people, which makes it more likely to meet potential friends. Plus, if you don't see a club you want to join, you can usually make one in high school, with the principal or teacher's permission. You can join more than one club if you have time (or if you don't have many extracurriculars). This allows you to meet all sorts of people. For example, you can join a coding club, a math club, and a drawing club. Socialize with the people in the club.

Express yourself. High school is the last frontier before you become an adult, so enjoy it while you can. High school is very stressful for many people, because of the pressures of school, applying to college, and becoming an adult. But, a way to enjoy it is to express yourself. In adulthood, you may not have the freedom to express yourself in the workforce due to high standards and expectations of being professional. Middle school and high school are good times to figure out your fashion sense, what music you like, what friends you look for, etc. Even if your school requires uniforms, you can still express yourself. Don't be forced into liking a certain type of style. Discover what you like on your own. Some fashion styles include the preppy, goth, emo, skater, punk, scene, VSCO, and fashionista styles. You also don't have to fit into one category; you can use accessories from multiple fashion styles. Find out what artists you like listening to. You don't have to listen to pop that's overplayed on the radio. You may find cooler underrated artists. Or, you may find musicians from earlier decades, like the 2000s, 90s, 80s, and 70s that you enjoy a lot.

Stay healthy. It isn't advisable to risk your health, no matter how young you are. You may think you can bounce back from health problems easily since you are only a teenager. In reality, bad health habits can ruin your health for years to come, into your adulthood. Smoking can permanently damage your lungs, and you increase your risk of lung cancer. Eating processed foods daily increases your chance of obesity, diabetes, high cholesterol, and heart attacks in the future. Set aside some time to exercise every day. Even walking for a few minutes increases your blood flow and trains your heart to be stronger. It can also reduce stress and make you happier. Gradually increase your workout intensity and length to strengthen your heart and lungs. Eat healthy. Never skip meals, and avoid binge eating for comfort. Eat a combination of vegetables, protein, fruit, grains, and dairy for each meal you eat. Eat unhealthy, processed foods in moderation if you like, but don't make it part of your daily diet. Avoid alcohol, smoking, and drugs. Alcohol damages your kidneys and liver. Smoking harms your lungs. Vaping isn't necessarily healthier either, since you're still inhaling toxic smoke. Drugs can harm any organ of your body irreparably and can lead to death quickly.

Take care of your mental health. In 2018-2019, the CDC reported that around 36.7% of adolescents had feelings of sadness or hopelessness. The mental health crisis is on the rise, and more teenagers are feeling anxious, worried, hopeless, and depressed. Causes of the mental health crisis include toxic family dynamics/struggling families , bullying , peer pressure , academic pressure , and social media usage . It seems like there are more teens with mental health issues now than in the previous decades. Also, recent negative events, such as school shootings, natural disasters, political turmoil, the COVID pandemic, and wars exacerbated symptoms. Luckily, there are ways to improve your mental health for the better if you are struggling. Reduce the stresses of school. Don't take as many classes if they are too difficult to handle. Ask for help from a trusted friend or a teacher. Find your downtime. Being very busy all of the time makes you overworked and burnt out. Remove some of your extracurriculars if they are causing you great stress. During your free time, engage in a hobby or relax. Reduce your social media usage or leave it altogether. Sometimes, social media makes you feel lonely, uninspired, or depressed. This is a good reason to leave social media. You don't have to "keep up with the Joneses", or in other words, keep up with every little online situation. Have hope for the future. People are often stuck in a rut because they are hopeless. Learn to stay positive through tough situations. Think of things you are grateful for, and get a support system. You can also visit a therapist to learn how to manage your inner feelings. In your school, school counselors are always a good option if you have no one to talk to.

Don't think too much of your future. Teens are often overwhelmed with the future. They're growing up, and they will have to learn how to deal with many tough situations themselves. Deciding whether or not to go to college, finding a suitable job, and moving out of your parents' house seem like confusing things to deal with. Besides, some are afraid of failure. What if I don't get into my top colleges? What if I find a job that pays well, but leaves me unfulfilled? What happens if I lose my job? Stop worrying so much over what the future holds, since ultimately, you are capable of determining what happens in your future. Focus on what you can do in the present to get to the life you want in the future. There is more than one path you can take. If one path doesn't work, you can always take another. Don't think that, because you got this boring job you'll have to work there forever. You have control over your life, and you're not destined to be unsuccessful or unhappy. Replace your catastrophizing with positive thoughts. Avoid telling yourself that you will fail your entrance exams or that you will suck at your profession. With hard work and perseverance, you can do things that will lead to your goal. Not succeeding once doesn't mean that you will fail at everything else. Don't put very high standards on yourself. You don't have to apply to all of the best universities and expect yourself to be accepted into all of them. This is simply not a realistic goal. If you get an A- instead of an A+, embrace it and think about what you can do better next time. Have hope for the future. It may seem like things are going terribly in your life right now, but your life will get better. Negative events in your life are temporary setbacks that you can eventually heal from, with time and support. Have hope for the world. You may be hearing a lot of negative news in your country and worldwide. This leads to teens having a lack of hope and trust in their life circumstances. However, thinking positively and trying to make a change in the world, no matter how little it may seem, will certainly make your outlook on life a little brighter.