KOCHI: Youngsters these days seem to be much more prone to hot tempers than the earlier generations. What has changed over the years? It could be the impact of changing lifestyles and the influence of media and social networks. Only if the causes of their anger are determined can there be a solution. There are lots of things that makes these young bloods boil. “I get angry if I am blamed for the wrong things or for no fault of mine,” says Maya, a student. The more youngsters are addicted to cell phones, the more they get disturbed and angry because of it. “When somebody doesn’t respond to my messages or calls it really makes my temper go high,” says Neda. They also get angry if someone tries to dominate them. “When someone bosses me because I am from a small town, despite being nice and polite towards others, I really get pissed off. To the rest I am cool,” says Uday, another student. Some get angry when they witness irresponsible people around them who don’t work but have the habit of interfering in others’ matters. Lying, back biting, orthodox mentality and intrusion into their private space are other aspects that they cannot tolerate. But there are a few who hardly get angry and instead get disappointed. “I get angry over a lot of things right from my sister to my neighbour and the reason is unpredictable. It all depends on my mood,” says Krithika, a masscom student. Attitude, laziness, cheating by people they trust and most importantly, a sense of injustice are other causes that make them angry.And when they are angry you never know what they end up doing. Stress is the beginning stage of anger. Says Dr P Ramachandrankutty, senior consultant psychiatrist, Lourdes Hospital. “When they are angry they don’t realise what they do. Throwing cell phones, screaming loudly, shouting and abusing the person responsible are common ways of expressing anger. Many end up locking themselves in a room and have a good cry. However, hunger adds fire to their anger. “I express my anger with sarcasm,” says Nitya. Some blame their parents for the situation. A few keep quiet without expressing their anger which is not the right way. Anger has to expressed in some way or the other, says Dr Ramachandrankutty. Anger is not always dangerous. It has negative as well as positive sides. Sometimes the anger goes to such an extreme where it becomes difficult to control and youngsters turn into alcohol and drug addiction. Anger can activate the left side of the brain which is associated with positive emotions. And like positive emotions anger can motivate them to pursue a certain objective which is happy and rewarding.How to control the temper is one of the major concerns of the boiling bloods. They commit mistakes and behave in such a manner which disturbs them and their parents. It’s their parents who become the target of their wild and angry behaviour. Some stay quiet, others sleep it off because relaxing makes them realise what went wrong. Yoga is the best way to keep your mind and body under control. It activates the positive energies of the body and makes you feel relaxed and peaceful. Meditation has the power to reduce tempers. Another effective way is to listen to music specially soft music. Sharing your problems and difficulties with your close ones and sorting out differences by talking is an intelligent move to control and realise both parties’ mistakes and problems.The best way in which parents can help their children in such a situation is by understanding them and their problems and spending some time with them. Be a constant pillar of support rather than scold or nag them with comparisons.Many a parent realise their mistakes only after committing all sorts of senseless acts. Later they regret it and try to sort it out by an apology. This might or might not work but they are definitely better than those who never have regrets as they feel that what they have done is right.
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